39 Weeks

I went to the doctor Monday and got a good report. I had really made no progress from last week {still 1.5 cm}, although he did say she had dropped some, so I was glad to hear that. I've been having so many contractions that I was a little surprised they haven't done more in the way of dilating. I feel like I've had a lot more with Sallie Cate than I ever did with Curran, and they are starting to get pretty uncomfortable some of the time. We went ahead and made a plan to induce on Monday, April 2 if I haven't had her by then. It is still pretty surreal to me that I'm going to have another child by this time next week! I am so excited, though!

I am planning to just relax {well, besides working} and enjoy this last week as the mother of one! I had a gift card for a facial and pedicure, so I did that on Sunday and it was blissful! I have just been trying to soak up my time with Curran, so we have been doing a lot of cuddling and vegging out and not much else. She is so sweet and loves hugging and kissing on my belly that I don't know what she's going to do when I don't have it anymore. :) Hopefully all that love will translate well to Sallie Cate and she won't miss my big belly that much. :) SC put on quite a show the other night for C and was just moving all around. C was getting so tickled.

I am really going to miss being pregnant. I read something on a blog recently that really resonated with me. It was a mom talking about the impending birth of her third child:

"the bitter that follows the sweet is having this pregnancy be over with. i'll miss the kicks, the feeling of having her growing inside of me… there is nothing in the world quite like it. and even though she will be in my arms, i won't have that anticipation of when is going to arrive? will she be healthy? what will she look like? how big will she be? and truth be told, i'll miss the anticipation, the unknown, the waiting.

our questions will be answered and life will go on. she will just be. that chapter will be over and that is something i have to work on letting go of. "

There is something so fun about the anticipation of the big day and it makes me sad think about it passing so quickly. I know how fast time will fly by, and I will be writing her monthly blog posts thinking to myself, "how in the world is she already 6 months old?!" I am bad to get myself depressed over the thought of something being over before it has even begun- like my maternity leave- I am so sad thinking about going back to work and it hasn't even started yet. Why can't I just enjoy the moment and not be constantly thinking about that moment coming to an end?

I am just so incredibly thankful for a healthy pregnancy {and prayerfully a healthy delivery and baby girl}! I was watching the episode of the Duggars last night where they lost their baby, and I just cried my eyes out. Think what you may of the Duggars {I personally really like them and think it's no one else bidness how many kids they want to have as long as they're well cared for, which clearly they are}, I would think losing a child has got to be the most devastating thing one could experience, no matter whether it's your first or your twentieth. And as I laid in bed last night feeling Sallie Cate hiccup away, I just couldn't keep the tears of thankfulness from flowing. It doesn't seem fair that I have had a full term, healthy pregnancy, while others are not so lucky. I am just so grateful. God- {and John-}willing this won't be my last pregnancy, but you never know. I just want to soak up these last few days and not wish away a moment.